One of my favourite pieces on the travesty which is Zimbabwe: Post Election is Tawanda Mudzonga’s This state we’re in:

An election happens and weeks later, no one knows the outcome. Life goes on. But behind each pleasant greeting and each stolen glance of the past three weeks there is unease. No one says a word, but we all feel it as we pass each other in the street. The distinct sense of expectation unfulfilled. We avoid each other’s eyes. The deception lies just below the surface, eyes veiled, hearts burning, and an anger and frustration hidden deep beneath social convention. Zimbabweans, famous for their infinite patience, are in shock. As a coping mechanism and alternative to violence, we have all adopted the distinctive reveal-nothing-and-remain-composed routine we have perfected as a collective cultural trait. Instead of raising our fists with violence, we collude and pretend that all is well. Harare is a broken machine, overflowing with repressed despair and misery. Emotionally exhausted from its decline, we protect ourselves from the open wounds of Zimbabwe’s stark reality.

. . .

Speculation is rife that the state will simply insist on a run-off and do Election 2.0. This time, they’re adopting Super Rigging: guaranteed results or your money back. And the MDC? After 8 years of trying, the MDC face the prospect of being outmanoeuvred once again. ZANU have done the unthinkable and are bluffing their way through with arrogance and the threat of their many degrees of violence. On the 29th of March, the nation participated in a fairly democratic process and unequivocally asked the fist to kindly step down please. ZANU, down but not out, simply turn the other way and plan their next move.

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I’ve been sifting through photographs of Zimbabweans beaten in the weeks following the 29 March Harmonised Election, and I’m feeling sick. What do I do with the outrage that boils up as I look at image after image of horrific brutality. And how do I stomach myself asking the question “which one portrays this horror ‘best’?” I’m angry with myself for even asking the question, and I’m angry with the “crisis what crisis” mentality that means I have to ask the question in the first place.

As James Hall wrote, is an African life so cheap, that 1,000 must die before there is a “crisis?”

I heard a bit of the BBC’s Hard Talk with Allan Little and Morgan Tsvangirai the other day. Little was asking Tsvangirai what the MDC was going to do about this latest election theft, and whether it was planning some sort of People Power solution like what was undertaken in Serbia or the Ukraine. Tsvangirai said no, he didn’t think that sort of approach was appropriate in Zimbabwe. Why not, asked Little. Because, Tsvangirai said, the regime in Zimbabwe is so violent, any sort of popular uprising like that would be brutally and violently crushed.

But isn’t this violent enough already? We are not already in a state of war, as MDC Secretary General Tendai Biti himself said recently. In which case, it’s about time we started fighting back.

We received this appeal to South African President Thabo Mbeki from a subscriber today:

Mr Mbeki 18th April 2008

Mr Mbeki,
It is late,
So late,
And we, a nation
Watch through the barred gate,
Of justice.
Which you walked through
To be president,
Above apartheid
And hate.
But, you make us wait
For just words you will never say.

Like Pilate,
You wash your hands
Of what has been in your power to do.
You slip through a side door
And allow
This Mad High Priest of the Past,
Mugabe,
To crucify,
Fourteen million people.
And the living water
Of deliverance,
Shimmers,
In your still hand.

Blood, exhaustion and sickness;
And filth and misery
And hunger
The pall of Hell,
Covers us.

And, you say,
“Zimbabwe ? Not today.”
To the Security Council.
And so, a nation is hung from a tree
And ZANU murderers walk free.

We ache with questions.
What scales cover your eyes ?
What steel seals your ears ?
What vault insulates your heart,
From the drum of echoing truth,
Of millions of voices ?

Does your conscience never wake you,
With the doves at dawn,
And warn,
Of our horror ?

Justice stands on a high hill.
Lord, deliver us from Dialogue and Debate.
As our People crawl through the river, mud and wire

To your Limpopo shore
To implore;
“Work..?.”

Our stolen elections lie scattered,
Like silver pieces
In the fields of the dead.
Blessed by your election monitors from the past,
Who will be asked, again,
“Why, did this happen ?”

It is late Mr Mbeki, so late
And your stubborn will
Has finished many of us.
What obscene loyalty compels protection
Of this geriatric murderer.

A liberation hero who kills his own people,
Remains a hero, no less ?
These stale lies of brotherhood
Gall the ears of mourners
At our funeral pyres.

Already night is falling
And the devil moves in darkness
His hyenas hunt again
And we the living,
Strain,
To hear the voice of any Shepherd.

Mr Mbeki,
If only I could make you
One of us here, the unseen,
For a day
To see what you have ignored.
To feel the grief, to taste the fear
Racing across parched fields
And empty huts
Like the wind called
Gukuruhundi
Like the storm called
Murambatsvina
Maybe then your heart would break
And you would awake.
Too late…

So, for want of any inspiring solution to the fiasco Zimbabwe’s 29 March election has become, we’re turning to humour.

Alex Magaisa recently sent us some creative answers to the classic question Why did the chicken cross the road?

Some of my favourites are:

Patrick Chinamasa: No. The chicken did not cross the road. In fact we need to verify whether in fact it was a chicken. As far as we know, the chicken is still there. It could have been an eagle. We have to wait until verification is done.

Robert Mugabe: The chicken will never be allowed to cross the road. Not in my life time! Let those that run away to Bush and Brown do so. Not my chicken! My chicken will never cross the road. It will never be colonised again!

Tendai Biti: We have irrefutable evidence from those who were at the road that the chicken has, indeed, without any shadow of doubt, crossed the road. I hereby declare that Chicken Huku Inkuku is now the legitimate resident of the other side of the road.

Judge of the High Court: Whether or not it crossed the road is a matter for the officials to declare at their own time. They have the power to order a re-check and verification as to whether it crossed the road before they can make the declaration.

Zimbabwe Electoral Commission: We are not in a position to say whether or not the chicken crossed the road. There are some people who have complained that it probably wasn’t a chicken at all and others saying it was being pushed or dragged against its will. We are currently considering whether to do a re-check before we can officially declare if the chicken crossed the road. We will take as long as we want to be fully certain that it was a chicken that crossed the road.

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In another worrying development, we’ve heard from a Kubatana member in the legal profession that there are plans to reopen ballot boxes in Mutare West, Chimanimani West, and possibly other constituencies as well on Friday 11 April. This is ostensibly in connection with recounts for these constituencies. Apparently the Zimbabwe Electoral Commission has notified the winning Members of the House of Assembly of this plan, but has not informed local observers and others with a right to witness this reopening of the ballot boxes – and the recounting of the ballot papers inside them.

However, Section 67A of the Electoral Act allows a recount only at ZEC’s own initiative, or if a complaint is made by a losing candidate or party within 48 hours. There has been no credible indication that such a complaint has been made. And ZEC has not said why it wants to reopen boxes, or what boxes it intends to open. In either case there must be reasonable grounds to believe there was a miscount. The arrests of isolated officials do not justify a recount, as any error or fraud here would have needed to have a lot of people being complicit in it, including police and party agents.

As our subscriber pointed out:

The polling process had precautions against fraud during counting and adding, with vote counting done by 11 officials in the presence of party agents, police and observers, and each result then being signed and posted at the polling station. Any fraud at either stage would have required the complicity of numerous people including the police. Every polling station record was made with 6 signed copies & under such supervision that no-one could have hoped to commit a fraud in counting or collating undetected. No complaints were heard from ZANU-Pf during this process. Various observers praised the process. ZEC delayed its own announcements confirming constituency results for days, saying it was checking all the results before doing so. When it announced them, ZANU-PF and state media still voiced no criticism.

In other words, if these recounts are occurring, is there any reasonable suspicion that votes were stolen from Zanu PF? Given the number of observers present at most polling stations, and the transparency of the process of transferring polling station level counts to constituency level tabulation forms, this seems highly unlikely.

With so public a process, there surely can be no reasonable suspicion that Robert Mugabe has been robbed by anyone. Why now open the ballot boxes?

Read more on this issue here

Even though the presidential results haven’t yet been announced, post-election violence and retribution by Zanu PF has begun across Zimbabwe, including Mashonaland East where local MDC officials were beaten by members of the Zanu PF militia in their area. View more images