Just now as I wandered through Newlands Shopping Centre in search of cash a vendor tried to sell me an automatic Italian umbrella, whatever that is.

I’d like to be able to flush the toilet at work except I can’t because we haven’t had water for the whole of this week. I’m starting to drink less, all the tenants in the building are starting to drink less, but its Not Working. The toilets are foul and our collective tempers are explosive. But back to the cash – imagine not being able to withdraw your money from the bank – admittedly there’s not a helluva lot you can buy with it, but still, it’s Mine.

What else? When it rains here our already demented drivers, drive even more poorly. Zimbabweans reckon that the best way to approach non-working traffic lights is to put their foot down on the accelerator, turn their hazards on, and go like the blazes. This might be a worthwhile tactic if you’re being pursued by a naked Oppah Muchinguri but its not helpful to other motorists who are trying to negotiate some right of way.

OK. So you can tell I’m stressed. In an effort to engage in some self-help I read a Time Magazine article on stress management last night. It said one should avoid TV and junk food if you’re feeling a bit edgy. Just before I read this I’d been watching So You Think You Can Dance while eating 4 liquorice strips.

The Moral Imagination is an important book to get hold of and spend some time with if you’re involved in conflict resolution and peace building. The author, John Paul Lederach, has mediation experience in a variety of countries including Nicaragua, Somalia, Northern Ireland and the Philippines. According to Lederach, peace building is both a “learned skill and an art”. He believes that people working for peace should regard their pursuit as a creative act.

In Chapter 2 Lederach includes four powerful stories of peace building from different countries including Colombia. In the Colombian example he looks at the emergence of a group called the Association of Peasant Workers of Carare (ATCC) and says “their first act was to break the code of silence. They developed ways of organizing and participating. Participation was open to anyone. The quota for entry was a simple commitment: Your life, not your money. This was expressed in the phrase “We shall die before we kill”. They developed a series of key principles to guide their every action.”

During these challenging times in the pro-democracy movement in Zimbabwe, I think its useful for us to consider how we can apply these principles while working for peace:

1. Faced with Individualization: Solidarity.

2. Faced with the Law of Silence and Secrecy: Do everything publicly.

3. Faced with Fear: Sincerity and disposition to dialogue. We shall understand those who do not understand us.

4. Faced with Violence: Talk and negotiate with everyone. We do not have enemies.

5. Faced with Exclusion: Find support in others. Individually we are weak, but together we are strong.

6. Faced with the need for a Strategy: Transparency. We will tell every armed group exactly what we have talked about with other armed groups. And we will tell it all to the community.

You wouldn’t imagine coming across cars doubled parked in the official Meikles Hotel car park would you? But there they were blocking up the works when I was trying to find parking last Friday. A colleague and I were visiting one of those high security places which Natasha referred to in her blog, Our Own Racists. Unsurprisingly we had a similar experience except this time we were two white women albeit with a sizable age difference. So at the front door the female security guard insisted on looking in our bags and that we hand over our cell phones. She gave my bag a cursory glance which is just as well because she’d need to don latex gloves on account of the fetid bits and pieces that lurk within. My colleague’s bag had a much more thorough going over and finally the security guard demanded that she hand it over. But she pointed indignantly at me and said, well what about her bag then? In response the security guard just shrugged and both our bags bridged security.

After our meeting we thought we’d treat ourselves to coffee and something to eat in the lounge at Meikles Hotel. One of the problems in Zimbabwe right now is trying to work out the correct value of goods to ascertain whether the price is a rip-off. I looked at the menu and saw that a toasted sandwich cost Z$1.3 million which means that a teacher’s salary is equivalent to about 12 toasted sandwiches per month. I thought I’d rather go for a piece of anchovy toast, some marmite toast and a coffee. The waiter returned 5 minutes later to say that there wasn’t any anchovy so I changed my order to marmite toast and a scone. The waiter returned 5 minutes later to say that there wasn’t any marmite. So I had a scone, without butter. And this is a 5 * hotel.

When we left and went to get the car I asked my colleague how much money she reckoned I should take out for 3 hours parking. We agreed on Z$300 000. Turns out it cost Z$40 000.

This upside/downess of Zimbabwe reminds me of an email I got recently from a friend who suggests . . .

Someone this week compared life in Zimbabwe at the moment to ‘living in a blender’. It is very apt. People are discernibly more stressed than they were 3 months ago. The effects are quite disturbing – as people fight to survive – there seems to be less tolerance and love available somehow and a narrow feeling of isolation and separation emerges. It is challenging to be in this space as we go through periods when we lose the thread to that which affirms and connects our lives.

The Zimbabwe Broadcasting Corporation (ZBC) is currently running a poll on their website.

They are interested in finding out who is responsible for the current shortages and they give us four “culprits” to choose from: manufacturers, retailers, the black market and western sanctions. So far the ZBC poll indicates that Zimbabweans think that the black market is responsible. Next in line with 31.23% is western sanctions, followed by manufacturers and lastly, retailers. It seems like the ZBC needs a little bit of help in expanding their list . . . email your suggestions of other causes of the current shortages to news@newsnet.co.zw

One of my favourite web sites is http://www.poetryinternationalweb.org – check out the Zimbabwe section where you’ll find some really beautiful poetry. I note that their poem of the week, The Lord Is My Shepherd, is by Cosmas Mairosi, a budding Zimbabwean poet.

THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD

the lord is my shepherd
I shall not want any other leader besides him
(even from his own party)
I shall have no other political party besides his
I shall not suffer any domination by the British
or the Americans
and my country shall never be a colony again

the lord is my shepherd
even if I walk in the valley of freedom
I am forced to attend his rallies
I shall not say what
I want because the police and the military will descend
on me

even if I walk in the shadow of poverty
I shall continually shout his
name and sing his praises
“long live my leader”

the lord is my shepherd
I shall not associate with members of the opposition
I shall not walk with demonstrators
for should I be found out
I shall be beaten or tortured

I shall have no other TV stations besides his
I shall see what he wants me to see
I shall hear what he wants me to hear
I shall read what he wants me to read

the lord is indeed my shepherd
I shall not starve
for I shall certainly be given food handouts
to vote for him
and other people’s land for free
squatting

but now the lord is not my shepherd
I have suffered many setbacks
my business operations have been closed my bank accounts frozen
my house has been demolished
my land has been confiscated
and unto me a new law hath been given:
“thou shalt praise the lordship in all his follies”.

In some ways things are looking up.

When I came to work the other day I saw two Movement for Democratic Change (MDC) vehicles in the car park. The vehicles were clearly sign written with the MDC name and slogan. This is progress because I can’t ever recall MDC vehicles being so identifiable. Perhaps their supporters will also be able to wear pro-opposition t-shirts without getting beaten up. When we talk (and talk and talk) about free and fair elections and an environment conducive to campaigning then we have to take into account whether Zimbabweans live in an atmosphere where they can wear pro-MDC t-shirts. A small point one might think, but the devil is in the detail.

On my way to the vet yesterday I drove past a stand of pine trees which look like they’re being illegally felled. Clearly in this instance its not the struggling person on the street who needs fuel for cooking, its the chefs who are intent on pillaging every corner of this country for short term personal gain. Of course one of the major frustrations in Zimbabwe is how to get recourse to the law and have this and other types of illegal activity addressed. I’ve written to the Combined Harare Residents Association (CHRA) but it seems that they can only send out emails and that they don’t know how to answer them. I’ve telephoned Environment Africa and they seem impotent. I’ve written to a number of Zimbabwean media houses and journalists requesting them to do a little bit of investigative reporting, but I’ve had no response. The environment is not a side issue and should be treated with more respect by the general public, civil society organisations and the ruling party. A friend in the office suggested putting plastic bags over the chef tree fellers heads to illustrate to them how much we need trees.

Once I got to the vet I forked out Z$18 million for medication. I’m still recovering. I did however have a light hearted moment when a woman in the waiting room started talking about a 2007 calendar published to raise funds for a group called SOAP (Support Old Age Pensioners). The calendar has 12 pictures of guys with their shirts off. She flicked it open to September and looked directly at me and said “isn’t he hunky?”. I almost said well I’d prefer to be looking at women but stopped short not wanting her to fall flat on her face. I had enough money left over to buy two cow hooves for my dogs. They’re very cheap – Z$10 000/each and the dogs have endless pleasure nibbling at them for hours on end – the only negative side effect is foul hoof breath.