In an effort to raise awareness for International Human Rights Day (10 December), Elvis Blue, South African Idols 2010 winner joined other celebrities worldwide to support the Barefoot Against Poverty Campaign. Despite his heavy schedule, he leapt at the idea of trading places with someone less fortunate than himself and agreed to experience life as a beggar. In a Press Release issued by Civicus (7 December), Blue understandably described his experience as “the hardest thing” he’d ever done. However, he also found walking in a less fortunate person’s shoes humbling and he believed that he had been made a better person for it.
Today (9/12) is International Anti-Corruption Day and I thought I could mark the day by adopting a concept similar to the Barefoot Campaign. Unlike Blue, I do not delight in the thought of subjecting myself to hardship and so I decided that I’d spend an imaginary day in the fantastic life of a GNU. HON. MP. CDE. & EOS. (Ever Obedient Son).
Not that their jobs are easy. Keeping this country moving forward and away from the detractors’ clutches demands an early start. To ensure that my strength is kept up throughout the day, at 10am I have a large breakfast (which includes a years’ supply of bacon, kindly donated by a friend). My physician (who is so kind as not to charge me for consultations) says is the most important meal of the day. In fact, a look at my form reveals that I consider all my meals important and so they are all justifiably of generous proportions.
I arrive at the office to find a pile of messages and mile-long list of things to do. With over 20 years in office I’ve acquired superior prioritisation skills and immediately get on the phone to touch base with my “father”. As his humble and obedient servant, I owe everything I am to him and I often like to share my good fortunes with him as a token of my gratitude.
The next few hours are spent meeting with or calling my accountant, my bankers, several of my farm managers, numerous business associates to convince them to make some mutually beneficial investments, some friends to thank them for their kind gifts and my realtors who manage all my houses, both big and small.
It’s almost 3pm and I prepare to leave the office to catch a chartered flight (a complimentary gift from a friend) to some remote place where I was scheduled to address some villagers at midday. On my way out, I promptly sign a scathing letter to stingy Kimberly, admonishing her for her cumbersomely correct process. Unlike my friends, she is definitely neither kind nor generous.
It is too late to return to the capital and so I check into a luxury hotel room that has efficient room service and a well-stocked mini-bar (for which I’m not being charged thanks to a good friend). I reflect on the day and am quite satisfied. I’ve accomplished a lot, managing to visit all my enterprises in the area. They are all flourishing due to the overwhelming support from my numerous friends. I was also able to make new friends who are eager to make a contribution to the cause. My address to the villagers went on well and they know what they must do to receive reward. As I fall asleep, I am quite convinced that indeed, I am a heavyweight in this game.